Reflections On Being A Eunuch

With my wife in Florida getting all the sex she can handle and being by myself, other than Saturday night/Sunday morning, I've had a lot of time to think.  One big conclusion is I LOVE being castrated! I have realized that so much of what males think and do is based on balls.  On testosterone really but that comes from balls.  By not having balls, I realize how much of my life was controlled by them.  I love the "eunuch calm" as it called being castrated has brought to my life and I wish I had been castrated long before now!

A second conclusion is, thinking back on the years of being married, I really don't like sex with women.  Oh I've done it and the orgasm is nice but I don't like what it takes to get to the orgasm.  I would much rather have masturbated.  If I'm absolutely honest, the only time I have REALLY enjoyed sex with my wife was after she had been with a man and I was fucking her through his cum.  Don't get me wrong.  I love my wife deeply but it's platonic love only, not erotic and platonic like most marriages.  What brought all of this to mind was what I described on Sunday morning.  There I was with a woman I had actually fucked years ago rubbing her hot wet pussy all over my shrunken little penis and it didn't respond at all.  And in thinking about it I am glad I didn't have any response so I didn't have to fuck her.  Another benefit of castration.

The third conclusion also comes from Sunday morning.  I slept with them Saturday night in between her and him.  Sunday morning I woke up with him snuggled up behind me.  And I liked it.  I'm quite small at barely 5'6" and being held by a man over 6' was lovely.  Sure, it's not the first time I have awakened with a man's arms around me but it is the first time I have had this much time to think afterward.  Saturday night was all about fucking but Sunday morning as I sucked him and then mounted him cowgirl, I was making love to him, to his cock.  Because I've known them for years, I was feeling some affection for him.  This led to the third conclusion.  I could quite easily fall in love with a man; I could easily marry a man I loved and be his castrated sex toy. That was a startling conclusion!

But not to worry, I'm not going to be leaving home or anything.  But I am going to be more proactive looking for men.  In the past, I've mostly depended on my wife selecting bi men as one or two of her steady boyfriends so that I could occasionally get my ass tapped.  I'm going to find someone who wants a castrated sissy bottom to use.