A Sex Vacation

One thing I have found being castrated for well over a year now is I am becoming a bit submissive.  Oh, I’m not talking about the put a dog collar on me and lead me around on a leash submissive.  Just less resistant to things.  For instance, my wife told me the other day she was going to Florida with one of her boyfriends for a few days of fun and nights of hot fucking.  Now while I love being a cuckold and the thought of my wife sleeping with another man has always been wonderfully humiliating, I would normally have wanted to go along on a trip like that.  But in this instance, I just said “Have fun.”  Another example involves this same boyfriend.  He had just finished fucking my wife and they were still snuggled in bed when he looked at me (he likes me to watch) and said, “Go get us a couple of glasses of wine.”  While it wasn’t said in a nasty manner, it also wasn’t a request, just a flat statement.  In the past, I would have brought the wine but I also would have given it back to him with something like, “Just who was your fucking maid last week?” 

But this also made me think.  This particular boyfriend works from home about 95% of the time.  His house has what’s called a Mother-In-Law apartment off the back deck.  It’s basically what’s now being called a tiny house and was where his mother-in-law lived prior to his divorce.  What I was thinking is, my wife and I have plenty of time off so what would it be like if we lived with him for say a month.  Well, actually it would be the two of them living together as husband and wife while I live in the apartment.  As their maid.  The only thing I would be allowed to wear seven days a week would be maid’s uniforms and I would do all the cooking, laundry, and cleaning.  Maybe just a plain uniform with flats for the daytime and a nice frilly French maid uniform with heels for the nights and weekends.   The only drawback I can see to this is she might not want to ever leave after 30 days and nights of being long dicked by him.  Of course, since the boyfriend is bi and likes to occasionally fuck me, after 30 days I might not want to leave either.

The Long "Arm" Of The Law

We live on the outskirts of a very large city and there is an attorney in the city who is quite successful, rich, handsome, single and has beautiful silver hair that he pulls back in a short ponytail.  All in all, the kind of man who makes who makes women drool.  He also has a very large cock and is fantastic in bed.  How do I know that?  Easy, my wife told me because he was one of her boyfriends for a while.  I've watched him sink his beautiful cock into my wife and heard her scream through a lot of orgasms while being fucked by him.  My wife says, out of the over 350 men she's fucked, if he isn't the best she's ever had, he's in the top five.  What's really funny is they met at a gang bang.  Hers!  He was one of the men attending and according to her, the other 8 men combined didn't come close to satisfying her as well as he did.  When the gang bang was over, my wife actually gave him her phone number and he obviously did call.  They saw each other for close to a year and I know my wife still thinks about him.  After all, he's well known here and is on the news frequently.  I swear the other night, when the news showed him in a courtroom, my wife had an orgasm just sitting in her chair.

Oh, I said he had a beautiful cock and he did.  It was about 8.5 inches and wonderfully proportioned, not too thick, not too thin.  I really wanted to fluff it.  Hell, I wanted to suck it until he shot a load down my throat, I wanted him to fuck me and cum in my ass.  But that wasn't something he was interested in, just my wife's pussy (and her blowjobs).  The closest I got was to clean his cum out of my wife.

I Have Been Surgically Castrated

When I was young, even before puberty around 8 or 9, I would push my testicle back up into the canal so there was nothing beneath my penis. By the way, I said testicle because one of mine was undescended and I didn’t have surgery to bring it down until I was 12.  Anyway, when I pushed it back up inside I liked the feeling and visual of nothing beneath my penis.  Now like I said this was before puberty and there was no sexual aspect to this, I simply liked not having anything there.  So it seems like I had a castration fetish even before there was anything sexual about it.  OK, granted when I got into puberty I would masturbate quite often thinking of not having any balls.  

Fast forward to today.  I no longer have a major castration fetish because I am castrated, no balls, neutered, emasculated, gelded or however you want to put it; I am a eunuch!  And I love it.  A while back I had written that my urologist seemed to blow off my testicular pain but when I emphasized to him how bad the pain was, he started paying attention.  He did try me on medications, tried numbing but it didn’t work.  So he started talking about other treatments including removal which sounded great to me.  I probably exaggerated the pain some (ok more than some) to him but there were times when I was literally sick at my stomach when I was hurting.  Finally he agreed to remove the one testicle with the pain and the other which had atrophied if my wife agreed.  Well, she hasn’t used my cock for anything since 2008 and knows about the fetish so it was no problem for her.  So on a fine spring day earlier in 2016, I walked into my doctor’s office and was escorted to the operating suite in the back.  I undressed, put on a gown and sat talking with my wife until they came in and started an IV.  Shortly after I was escorted into the operating room and I lay down on the operating table.  The anesthesiologist came over and told me he was putting something into my IV and I would feel warm for a few seconds before I went out.  As he injected the anesthesia I knew I would be out very quickly and my last very happy thought was I would shortly be castrated.  Of course I was asleep but what happened next was they put my feet up in stirrups, shaved me, my surgeon came in, took a scalpel and sliced open my scrotum.  He then pulled one testicle out, tied off the cord as high as he could and cut off the testicle.  Then he repeated that on the other side and it was done, around 11:15 in the morning I was castrated (I love saying that).  Then they sewed me back up, bandaged me, put a sanitary napkin between my legs, put what amounted to a gauze panty on me and sent me out to recovery.  Not long after that I woke up in recovery a little foggy and as the fog cleared I gave my wife a big grin which she returned.  It really hadn’t sunk in at the time but over the next few days I kept saying to myself over and over, “I’ve been castrated!” until it finally sank in.  A couple of things about my castration.  Normally with a surgical incision, the doctor stitches it up tight so there is no leakage.  With castration because of how it’s done and how fluid builds up in the area, it’s apparently not stitched tight.  For two or three weeks afterward as you heal, you leak both blood and fluid.  So you have to use pads to keep your panties from becoming blood stained.   At first I was changing my pad three times a day and it’s a little strange telling your wife you are running low on sanitary napkins so would she pick up some at the drugstore for you.  The other rather strange thing is pulling your panties down and seeing a bloody sanitary pad between your legs like you were having your period.  Startling!  There was also something a little surprising.  In discussion online with other eunuchs, people talked about swelling of the ends of the cords where severed after castration so that for a few weeks, it was like there were still testicles until the swelling went down.  Also they talked about bruising and pain.  One close friend several years ago was bruised up to the bellybutton and several people talked about that kicked in the groin feeling.  I had none of that.  My cords did not swell, I didn’t bruise and I had NO pain, none.  It’s almost like my body was understanding that I was meant to be a eunuch and the surgery was just getting me where I should be.  There is a doctor in the US who will castrate anyone who desires it in his office.  But the cost is a few thousand dollars.  Because he had been treating me for pain, my doctor was able to write my castration up for my insurance.   People who want to be voluntarily castrated just to become eunuchs are paying around five thousand dollars but I was able to do it for one hundred forty dollars.  One thing about the doctor who will castrate anyone is he does it under a local with just a nurse.  He allows photographs and will hold your testicles for you to take a picture of them.  So you can actually photo and video record your castration. I really would have liked to have photo or video records of mine.

It’s been six months now and I have some interesting observations.  When you are impotent, as I was for a few years, you still have desires and while you don’t have physical erections, there are “mental erections.” Even when I was impotent and my penis wouldn’t get hard, I still had desires for orgasms.  Even when I wrote about my wife wanting to get the Viagra so I could fuck her and I didn’t want to fuck her, it wasn’t that I didn’t really want to.  It’s just as a sissy I felt she should get sex from a real man.  It didn’t mean I wouldn’t enjoy an orgasm.  However being castrated is different.   While everyone’s experience is different and some eunuchs take longer than others to lose interest in sex, mine was almost immediate.  Now not only is my little penis was no longer interested in sex, neither is my brain.   It’s hard to explain.  I remember masturbating before I became impotent but now, even if I could now I just doesn’t seem like it would be worth the effort.  I remember what sex is, I just no longer understand why anyone would bother.  I used to get mentally excited watching a man fuck my wife but now it’s no more exciting than watching them sit and talk.  Why would you expend all that energy for just a couple of moments orgasm?  Oh it doesn’t mean I no longer have sex or maybe I should say I’m still used for sex.   One of my wife’s longer term boyfriends is bi and he is fascinated by me being castrated.  So he’s fucked me a few times since my castrations and that also is totally different.  Before I would enjoy both the physical feeling of his cock in me and the mental excitement of being used.  There was an element of sexual satisfaction to being fucked.  Now it’s just something mechanical done to me.  Oh his cock in my ass still feels good but it’s the feel good of a massage, not mental pleasure of sex and my main thought is I’m bored and will you hurry up and cum.  The same goes for sucking his cock.  Before I would enjoy it and it would be sexually stimulating but now when I do it all I’m trying to do is get it over with and thinking isn’t he ready to fuck my wife yet?  I’m also discovering that I am becoming more and more submissive to her and this particular boyfriend which is surprising as I’ve never considered myself truly submissive.  Sure I enjoyed humiliation but I didn’t like being really bossed around.  The other day, when he was getting ready to fuck my wife, he ordered me to do something and I didn’t even hesitate to obey like I would have in the past.  I actually enjoyed the humiliation of instantly obeying him.  While there is no sexual aspect to it, I find myself occasionally thinking how much fun it would be to spend some time as his servant.  I’m actually thinking about asking my wife is she wants to take some vacation to spend with him, her as his wife and me as their maid.  I think it would be interesting since he has a small apartment off the deck in back of his house where his ex-wife’s mom used to live.  It’s a small apartment with just a living room/bedroom combination, a bathroom and a tiny kitchen but it is separate from the house.  My wife would be living in the house with him as basically his wife and I would be living in the apartment at night while working in the house during the day like any servant.  I am almost positive my wife would say yes and, since she doesn’t work along with me having eight weeks of vacation we could spend as much as a month.  Plus this is the boyfriend she went on a five day road trip with in his RV so she's spent the night with him a few nights.  No telling how submissive I might be at the end of that time.  As a second thought however, it should probably be less than a month for two reasons.  First, if she spent a month getting fucked by his big dick every night, she might never want to leave.  Second if I spent a month as their maid wearing nothing but my maids uniforms, I might never want to leave either.

So some final thoughts on being castrated.  Obviously castration is not for everyone but it is for me and  I feel great.  It’s so amazing to reach between my legs and there is nothing beneath my ever shrinking penis.  And my panties fit so much better with only a tiny bulge in them.  Even when you’re impotent, there is still a sexual drive and now that is gone forever.  I will never penetrate anything again, I will only be penetrated.  My sex life is over forever and I don’t care nor do I want it back.  I am also seriously thinking of getting a Eunuch tattoo for people to see.  Oh, it wouldn’t be Eunuch in English, it would be this 宦官 which means Eunuch in Japanese. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to walk around with a permanent mark that you are castrated?  

Oh and finally, while I didn’t fuck her, the night before I was castrated my wife gave me a blow job because she thought I should have one last sexual experience as a male.  My first sexual contact with a woman in over 8 years and yes, I orgasmed.  She commented that I actually got semi-hard and asked if the thought of being castrated was what was turning me on.  I’ve always been honest and I told her yes, it did even more that watching men fuck her.  That the thought of the next day my balls would be cut off and gone forever was a huge turn on and it was what I was thinking about when I was cumming.

I have been castrated and I love it!  I am a

EUNUCH!

Should The Wife's Boyfriend Have Control Of A Sissy Cuckold's Chastity Key?

Here is an interesting idea for sissies in chastity who are also cuckolds.  Why not let the hotwife's boyfriend control the key.  Then only allow the sissy to be unlocked in the morning after the boyfriend has spent the night in bed fucking and sleeping with the wife while the sissy slept on the floor beside the bed.  The sissy could then be humiliated by following the boyfriend for sloppy seconds(or thirds or fifths) if, as a cuckold, the sissy is allowed sex with the wife or, if not allowed, made to masturbate for the entertainment of the wife and boyfriend.

Online Gangbang Groups

One thing I've mentioned a few times is my wife having gangbangs, but how they were set up is another story.  You could go out to a bar and round up a few men but generally, despite fiction and captioned photos, picking up a man or men in a bar is not really a good idea.  You may get someone who is great in bed but you could get someone who lets alcohol override his good sense and does something stupid or you could even get someone who is a member of serial killers anonymous and the Ted Bundy fan club.  So what's a good way to set one up then?  Gangbang groups.

One of my wife's lovers mentioned to her that he belonged to a group specifically for women to set up gangbangs and he would be glad to nominate her for membership if she was interested.  She asked me what I thought about it and I told her it was totally up to her.  So she accepted his offer and he nominated her to the group moderator.  After a few e-mails back and forth, she was accepted into the group.  Men were much more heavily screened and could easily be kicked out at the moderator's discretion for not behaving at one event or another.  I never knew the exact figures but it seemed like the group had somewhere around 6 to 1 ratio of men to women with anywhere from a couple hundred .  I understand that the group started out as a Yahoo groups and then went private.  The way it basically worked was this.  When a woman wanted to set up a gangbang, she e-mailed the moderator.  She specified the date (primary and backup dates) the number of men she wanted, activities allowed or not allowed, such as one at a time, DP, airtight, if anal was or not allowed, yes or no regarding condoms, if voyeurs were allowed and if any women were to be included.  She also would specify if she was hosting or if they needed hosting by someone else.  If the woman was hosting, all other participants were expected to provide refreshments. If the woman was not hosting but someone else was, then all participants except the ones hosting and the woman guest of honor were expected to chip in and buy refreshments.  If the woman couldn't host and no one else volunteered, then the moderator would reserve a hotel room and participants (except her) were expected to chip in for the room and refreshments.  Once the moderator got the information, he then puts it into his e-mail group data base set up and sends out an all call e-mail blast to the group.  Men would respond if interested and available on the dates set by the woman or couple until the requested number are filled along with a few extra and at that time, they are given the once over by the woman.  A man might be disqualified for any reason by the woman and the moderator had final say so if he felt one of the men responding was not a good fit.  Husbands were allowed to attend as long as he had no behavior complaints against him but he was strictly an observer allowed to take pictures but not to participate.  Now husbands could be invited to join the group as one of the men but, due to my small size, I obviously never was.

Anyway what my wife would do is e-mail the moderator that we could not host but she wanted x amount of men (usually between 6 and 10)  since my wife considers fucking less than six men a quiet evening spent with friends. She usually requested two specific men to be among the number she wanted.  One was the moderator who had a fairly nice length cock but was very thick.  The other was a good looking older man who was in very good physical condition and possessed a large cock which looked to be a little over 8 inches.  After that she would choose the rest of the men from those submitted (with photos).  Occasionally she would ask for another woman to be included just to satisfy her urge to eat pussy and the men generally loved watching two women in a 69.  One thing my wife tried to do was get a few new men every gangbang.  She might even leave off someone who applied that she knew was a good fuck to include someone new.  This had a twofold purpose as it let her sample more and more of the men in the group and it let her increase the number of men she had fucked.  Now don't get me wrong, she would never have sex with a man just to increase her number but, if the opportunity presented itself, she didn't mind increasing her "notches on the headboard."  Once the gangbang started, it was up to the men to sort out the order in which they would go with one exception.  The moderator always went last with my wife.  The simple reason for this was all the men were required to wear condoms except the moderator.  You see, after her first gangbang, she found she liked the way the moderator fucked her and they occasionally met for some one on one sex.  So he went last in the gangbangs because he was allowed to fuck her bareback and cum in her.  This had a dual purpose.  First of course was just the simple act of fucking bareback and letting him cum in her.  According to my wife, this made the sex even more exciting to her just knowing I was watching him pump he cum deep in her.  The second purpose was to allow me to enter her using a man's cum as lube, something that always made my premature ejaculation even more premature.  I've actually cum just as I entered her knowing a man had just fucked her.

If you've read my other posts you know that I worked out of town a lot.  She tried to do the gangbangs only when I was home but once or twice, I had to work extra and didn't make it in time.  Also, the moderator of the group recommended her to another gangbang group in the city where I was working so that opened up an entirely new group of men for her.  So if I was at home, she could set up a gangbang with our local group or if she was visiting me, she could set up a gangbang there.  Now this wasn't a weekly thing but she sure tried to set one up at least once every other month or so. 

*Note: See the separate post for the story of my wife's accidental gangbang.

Now I know that gangbangs are not for everyone.  Some women don't mind taking on a lover but just couldn't do a large number of men.  Some husbands can watch and enjoy their wives taking on a man but watching a number of men take her would be beyond their limits.  However, if a woman is sure she can handle it without guilt and her husband is sure he can tolerate viewing it, I have to say there is nothing like watching man after man take and pleasure your wife.  My wife says there is nothing like laying in a bed and knowing that all the men in that room are going to fuck her at least once and some twice.  It may take some doing but try to find a group near you.  Believe me they are out there and most major cities will have at least one.  I also know that some online adult swinger sites like SexyAds or AdultFriendFinder have sections for groups looking for women.  Try it, you may very well like it.

I Took Some Purity Tests Online Today

I took a few purity tests today just playing around online.  One rated me 32.4% pure, another rated me 22% pure and a final one rated me 20% (Totally Depraved).  Apparently the only lower rating I could have gotten on that test was Sick and Wrong.  And to think, I only missed that one by a few points!  Actually I figured it out that I missed it by ten points and that I was the top of the Totally Depraved.  One more point and I would have gone to Decidedly Perverted,  I also took a Sexuality Spectrum and was rated as bi with gay leanings.  I guess that means given a choice between pussy and cock, I'll take the cock.

The first test with the 32.4% score was a 1000 question test and the second 22% score was a 200 question test from the same website.  One obvious reason for the different score is on the 1000 word test they might ask four questions regarding getting scratches on your or your partners back during sex.  You might answer one yes and three no.  Meanwhile, on the 200 question test, they might combine all of these into one question allowing you to answer with one yes only to that question.  Since each yes lowers your purity and each no raises it, obviously you will score lower where several questions are combined.  There is also a 500 question test on the same website which I'm sure would show a result somewhere between the two.

The third test was only 100 questions so again it's a matter of less no answers and more yes answers.  It did seem they had cribbed a lot of their questions from the website with the 200, 500 and 1000 question tests.  The difference with the site is their rankings of purity.  The following are their rankings and, as you can see, I almost made it to the top or maybe the "bottom of the barrel."  I guess maybe if I when my Boxer had humped my leg when I was a teen, if I had let him...nah being knotted wouldn't be worth a lower score would it? Or maybe I could have jacked off a horse down at the farm. I don't remember if this test had a question about it, I'm not setting up a drug lab to get a lower score.  Walter White I'm not!  Oh well, at least only 2% of the people who took this test were more warped that me.  So I can proudly say I'm more fucked up than 98% of the people who took this test.

20% pure: Totally Depraved

You are just 20% sexually pure!

Your Analysis (Vertical line = Average)

• 
  
  You scored 20% on purity, higher than 2% of your peers.

All possible test results 

Sick and Wrong 

Totally Depraved

Decidedly Perverted

Very Kinky

Somewhat Debaucherous

Rather Experienced

Tad Inexperienced

Mostly Innocent

Uncorrupted

Pure as Driven Snow

The results of the Sexuality Spectrum I think are a little skewed by the way they ask questions.  For instance, if we are happily married, even if she and I are both getting sex from men and not each other, it still counts toward being heterosexual.  On the test, it doesn't matter if my idea of great sex is sucking a cock hard before he fucks my wife.   It doesn't matter if my idea of group sex is sitting in the corner watching ten men gang fuck my wife or laying on the bed with ten men DPing me.  It doesn't matter that I haven't had sex with my wife in five and a half years but she's been fucked hundreds of times by a lot of men (and a few women)  in that same period.  It doesn't matter if my idea of a long cock slowly sliding in and out is in and out of my ass.  If you are happy with your wife as a platonic partner, or in other words almost a sister, it's hard to score very much on the gay side.

 This is the website for the 200, 500 and 1000 question tests.  Answer them honestly and post your scores in comments here.  http://www.puritytest.net/   Try it out and let me know how well or poorly you did.

 

Sissie