With my wife in Florida getting all the sex she can handle and being by myself, other than Saturday night/Sunday morning, I've had a lot of time to think. One big conclusion is I LOVE being castrated! I have realized that so much of what males think and do is based on balls. On testosterone really but that comes from balls. By not having balls, I realize how much of my life was controlled by them. I love the "eunuch calm" as it called being castrated has brought to my life and I wish I had been castrated long before now!
A second conclusion is, thinking back on the years of being married, I really don't like sex with women. Oh I've done it and the orgasm is nice but I don't like what it takes to get to the orgasm. I would much rather have masturbated. If I'm absolutely honest, the only time I have REALLY enjoyed sex with my wife was after she had been with a man and I was fucking her through his cum. Don't get me wrong. I love my wife deeply but it's platonic love only, not erotic and platonic like most marriages. What brought all of this to mind was what I described on Sunday morning. There I was with a woman I had actually fucked years ago rubbing her hot wet pussy all over my shrunken little penis and it didn't respond at all. And in thinking about it I am glad I didn't have any response so I didn't have to fuck her. Another benefit of castration.
The third conclusion also comes from Sunday morning. I slept with them Saturday night in between her and him. Sunday morning I woke up with him snuggled up behind me. And I liked it. I'm quite small at barely 5'6" and being held by a man over 6' was lovely. Sure, it's not the first time I have awakened with a man's arms around me but it is the first time I have had this much time to think afterward. Saturday night was all about fucking but Sunday morning as I sucked him and then mounted him cowgirl, I was making love to him, to his cock. Because I've known them for years, I was feeling some affection for him. This led to the third conclusion. I could quite easily fall in love with a man; I could easily marry a man I loved and be his castrated sex toy. That was a startling conclusion!
But not to worry, I'm not going to be leaving home or anything. But I am going to be more proactive looking for men. In the past, I've mostly depended on my wife selecting bi men as one or two of her steady boyfriends so that I could occasionally get my ass tapped. I'm going to find someone who wants a castrated sissy bottom to use.
Random thoughts from a cuckold, wimp, castrated sissy faggot regarding my wife's close to 500 lovers, my lovers, a few who have had us both and any other thing that happens to cross my very fucked up mind.
Monday, July 24, 2017
Sunday, July 23, 2017
Last Night
My wife is in Florida being fucked silly by one of her boyfriends. Well last night, I had sex with a man and a woman! Well okay, he fucked me in the ass while I licked her pussy and she made fun of both of us. Calling her husband pathetic excuse for a man and only good for fucking faggot asses while calling me a castrated baby dicked little pussy who is good for only being used as a cunt. It was so much fun.
Now first of all, I've known this couple for years and we met when they answered my wife's ad. They are both very sweet, bisexual and quite adventurous. In fact, she was the last woman other than my wife, I ever fucked and we have a long sexual history. She and my wife did a 69 right next to her husband and me doing a 69, I've fucked her, she's given me a blowjob, her husband has fucked my wife, my wife has given him a blowjob, I've fucked the husband, he's given me a blowjob, he has fucked me and I've given him a blowjob. She has been absolutely fascinated by me being castrated, loving to feel between my legs where my balls used to be. She even woke me up once during the night feeling me. This morning she told us to "entertain ourselves" while she went and made breakfast although she did stay and watch while I fluffed her husband but went out when I mounted him cowgirl. We were relaxing with my head on his shoulder and his arm around me when she came in to tell us breakfast was ready. I did clean up so as not to mess up their kitchen chairs. The funniest moment of the entire time I was there happened when I went in the bedroom to dress. She came in doing a sexy walk, shoved me back on the bed, jumped on me, Then started rubbing her pussy all over my little dick and passionately kissing me. After about a minute with no reaction from my little dick, she looked me in the eyes and said. "Wow, you really don't have any sexual feelings do you?" I told her I enjoyed the kisses and the touching and her pussy felt pleasurable but not sexually. She told me she was amazed at the difference between before I was castrated and now. That before I could get excited but wouldn't fuck because I didn't want to break my streak of not fucking a woman ( now at almost 9 years) and now I have no interest and can't fuck a woman. I'm now her best "girlfriend" and next time she wants to go for a girls night out, I'm her winggirl to keep men from bothering her.
Now first of all, I've known this couple for years and we met when they answered my wife's ad. They are both very sweet, bisexual and quite adventurous. In fact, she was the last woman other than my wife, I ever fucked and we have a long sexual history. She and my wife did a 69 right next to her husband and me doing a 69, I've fucked her, she's given me a blowjob, her husband has fucked my wife, my wife has given him a blowjob, I've fucked the husband, he's given me a blowjob, he has fucked me and I've given him a blowjob. She has been absolutely fascinated by me being castrated, loving to feel between my legs where my balls used to be. She even woke me up once during the night feeling me. This morning she told us to "entertain ourselves" while she went and made breakfast although she did stay and watch while I fluffed her husband but went out when I mounted him cowgirl. We were relaxing with my head on his shoulder and his arm around me when she came in to tell us breakfast was ready. I did clean up so as not to mess up their kitchen chairs. The funniest moment of the entire time I was there happened when I went in the bedroom to dress. She came in doing a sexy walk, shoved me back on the bed, jumped on me, Then started rubbing her pussy all over my little dick and passionately kissing me. After about a minute with no reaction from my little dick, she looked me in the eyes and said. "Wow, you really don't have any sexual feelings do you?" I told her I enjoyed the kisses and the touching and her pussy felt pleasurable but not sexually. She told me she was amazed at the difference between before I was castrated and now. That before I could get excited but wouldn't fuck because I didn't want to break my streak of not fucking a woman ( now at almost 9 years) and now I have no interest and can't fuck a woman. I'm now her best "girlfriend" and next time she wants to go for a girls night out, I'm her winggirl to keep men from bothering her.
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Friday, July 21, 2017
A Sex Vacation
One thing I have found being castrated for well over a year
now is I am becoming a bit submissive.
Oh, I’m not talking about the put a dog collar on me and lead me around
on a leash submissive. Just less
resistant to things. For instance, my
wife told me the other day she was going to Florida with one of her boyfriends
for a few days of fun and nights of hot fucking. Now while I love being a cuckold and the
thought of my wife sleeping with another man has always been wonderfully
humiliating, I would normally have wanted to go along on a trip like that. But in this instance, I just said “Have fun.” Another example involves this same
boyfriend. He had just finished fucking
my wife and they were still snuggled in bed when he looked at me (he likes me
to watch) and said, “Go get us a couple of glasses of wine.” While it wasn’t said in a nasty manner, it
also wasn’t a request, just a flat statement.
In the past, I would have brought the wine but I also would have given
it back to him with something like, “Just who was your fucking maid last week?”
But this also made me think.
This particular boyfriend works from home about 95% of the time. His house has what’s called a Mother-In-Law
apartment off the back deck. It’s
basically what’s now being called a tiny house and was where his mother-in-law
lived prior to his divorce. What I was
thinking is, my wife and I have plenty of time off so what would it be like if
we lived with him for say a month. Well,
actually it would be the two of them living together as husband and wife while
I live in the apartment. As their
maid. The only thing I would be allowed
to wear seven days a week would be maid’s uniforms and I would do all the cooking,
laundry, and cleaning. Maybe just a
plain uniform with flats for the daytime and a nice frilly French maid uniform
with heels for the nights and weekends. The only drawback I can see to this is she
might not want to ever leave after 30 days and nights of being long dicked by
him. Of course, since the boyfriend is bi and likes to occasionally fuck me, after 30 days I might
not want to leave either.
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